Norway

The first night in Oslo I checked into the hostel and walked around the city. It was rainy and cold. I read the guidebook and talked with the staff at the hostel and there really isn't very much to do after sunset on a Sunday in Oslo. I ducked into a pub where the Chelsea vs. Arsenal game was on all of the TV's. The matchup is equivalent to the Texas OU game (too soon). The place was packed. Just like in the States, if I'm going to watch a game I feel obligated to buy a drink. I order a Norwegian pint and hand the bartender 200 kroners ($40) expecting a lot of change. Well, she gave me back 130 kroners($26). My beer cost $14! I sat down and watched the game laughing at the ridiculousness of a $14 beer. If anyone ever complains about beer prices in the US come to Norway and you will have good reason to complain. Alcohol is taxed like Robin Hood took a vacation to Brighton and the Sherriff of Nottingham is on speed.

The game was great and I looked around to see that barely anyone bought anything from the bar. Oh the curse of being a polite American tourist. $14 was the amount I hoped to spend on that drink and an entire dinner. Once again, I was mistaken. I ordered the cheapest pizza slices on the menu in the cafe on the 1st floor of the hostel and my bill came to $23. I saw an advertisement on the side of a bus with a Big Mac meal for the "low" price of 70 kroners ($14)...In the immortal words of Inspector Gadget, Wowsers.

The next morning I got up early to rain and, you guessed it, frigid weather. I had coffee and a piece of toast in the cafe on the bottom floor of the hostel (they had special prices for people staying there). Coffee and a piece of toast cost 25 kroners ($5). I talked with the owner for a while and he threw me another piece of toast for free. He was interested in how much a person can happily live on in Texas in a month. I told him it is like everything is 75% off, but you have to pay for healthcare. He told his wife they need to move to Texas.
After breakfast I walked all over Oslo. I saw the changing of the guards at Akershus castle. There is a huge statue of FDR looking out on the bay just under the castle. I wish I had all of my pictures here, they were really great, but that is a story for a bit later. After the castle I took a ferry to the Fram Museum. The Fram is a ship famous for exploring the North and South Poles. I didn't know all of the stories of the Norwegian explorers who risked everything to reach the poles. A British crew was also attempting to reach the pole, but finally reached it only to find a tent with a huge Norwegian flag billowing in the frozen wind. Ouch. The Fram is in the middle of the museum. I walked all throughout the decks and have no idea how they did what they did in such a small ship.

Across the street from the Fram was the Kon Tiki Museum. So maybe I don't know very much about the world, but the Kon Tiki Museum is all about Thor Heyerdahl, a Norwegian explorer and writer who believed ancient societies were able to make their way across oceans in their primitive boats. He built boats the way they would have been built 800-1000 years ago and sailed them across the ocean proving how different cultures moved across continents. His crews consisted of men each from a different country. Inspirational story.

On the way back from the ferry I went by the Nobel Prize Museum. I got to bed early that night after walking so much. I was awoken by a guy in the same hostel room saying he needed to borrow my phone charger. I was disoriented and gave the charger to him and told him to give it back in the morning. I went back to sleep and woke up to find my Iphone which I hid under my pillow because it was my alarm clock was gone. I was not happy. I had to file a report with the police which caused me to miss my train to Bergen. All of my pictures from the previous day were on my phone. I lost my camera, phone, gps, alarm clock, watch, and music player. Not cool. The thief forgot to steal my passport, credit cards, cash, netbook, and what's left of my dignity. I truly wish that person a lifetime of dropped calls.

I got on the last train out of Oslo to Bergen. On the trip I finished reading "The Imperfectionists," a book with multiple fictional stories and perspectives on the currrent state of the newspaper industry. It was a great read. The train ride to Bergen from Oslo is one of the most scenic train routes in the world and I was very dissapointed to have to travel it in the dark, but I needed to get to Bergen to make my hostel reservations. Just to make the day better, the man sitting across from me on the train spilled hot coffee on me. What a day.
I got to a rainy Bergen at about 11 PM. I walked to the hostel in the rain only to find the reception at the hostel was closed and someone had forgotten to put my key in the secret safe like they said they would. I had to walk around in the rain to find internet, pay for internet, call security who gave me another number to call in order to find someone to find me a key. Fun times!

I finally got into my hostel room to find no one else was in my room that night. This was a bit of comfort after a rough day.

The next morning I woke up to cold rain yet again. I walked to a laundromat, supposedly the only one in Bergen. Two loads of laundry cost $25 and I didn't even pay someone else to do it. After the laundry was finished I went to the tourist information booth to ask where to buy a digital watch to I could know what time it is and set an alarm. The place they said is the cheapest in Bergen sold very cheap digital watches for the low price of $125...Ugh. I went to a different store and settled on an old school alarm clock which would cost $4 in the US, but in Bergen cost $45. Sorry for talking about money so much, but it really is amazing how much more expensive everything is in Norway. I really do love Bergen. It is a perfectly picturesque town. Fjords surge up on either side of the town and all of the houses match with vibrant colors and tiled roofs. I took a special tram up to the top of one of the fjords which overlooked the town. An American girl and a Norwegian guy were behind me in the best seats on the tram, but the American girl was spazzing out over the heights and so I switched seats with them. I think the Norwegian guy should dump the girl, she was so whiny. She got to the top and wouldn't walk near the observation deck and kept saying she wanted to go back down. The view from the top was spectacular. The fjord is so steep hovering over the city you feel like you are on a skyscraper looking out over one of those Dickens Snow Villages people put out around Christmas time. The overcast weather just added a mystical element to the scene.

I got back to the hostel and read until I fell asleep. Unfortunantely my hostel room filled up. I woke up twice at around 4:30 AM because the gassy older man on the top bunk couldn't stop his phone alarm from going off. The other older man across from us on the lower bunk finally yelled "Are you $#%^# stupid turn off your phone. You are in a hostel with other people, please be considerate and let us #$^#% sleep!" Fun times...
I got up early the next morning because my hostelmates were incapable of being silent when getting up. They each made tea in the room before 8 AM. This should be a crime. No tea pot should howl before 8 AM. I got up and drank a strong coffee at a local coffee shop. I then ventured out of Bergen to see the home of famous Norwegian composer Grieg. The tourist information center told me to take the tram 30 minutes out of town to a certain stop and then I would see signs to Grieg's House. I got to the stop and found zero signs to anywhere...Awesome. I walked about a mile to a gas station and the lady was very kind and showed me on a map how I needed to go back the way I came and go another 2-3 miles by foot. I bought an orange juice as a thank you for her troubles and because I feel like I'm coming down with a slight cold ($6). I walked with a backpack the 3 miles to Grieg's House. I was the only person there. I got a personal tour of the house for the same price I paid for an orange juice. Many of you are probably thinking, who is this Grieg guy and why did Brent go all the way out there to see his place. Well see if this is familiar. You can play it while you continue reading:

I learned a great deal about the famous composer. He was very short, but in all of the pictures he used the same technique Peter Jackson used in The Lord of the Rings by standing 5 steps closer to the camera than the other person in the picture to make it look like he was a normal size. Grieg was also sick with TB as a child and it caused one of his shoulders to droop down further than the other. He is well known for starting the fraternity popped collar by holding the collar of the drooping side up to make it look like his shoulders are even. Very interesting to learn about the insecurities of such an accomplished man. Grieg also married his first cousin, which should have been an insecurity for him. The house was very quaint with impressive pictures, silver, and a polished piano Grieg and his wife would use daily. After the tour I walked down to the small hut where Grieg wrote his masterpieces. I was all alone sitting on a rock and pulled out my netbook to play some of his music.I listened to Peer Gynt looking over the water and islands of trees as the sun danced over the waves to the music, and the water kept time gently climbing up the shore before falling back again. The trees acted as a sort of background percussion to the music. At just the right moment during In the Hall of the Mountain King a wave crashed against the rocks beginning the exploding chorus. A peaceful moment I won't forget.


I made the 3 mile walk back to the tram got back to Bergen in one piece. Shortly thereafter, I met up with a camper from the camp I was a junior counselor at when I was 16. She was 11 at the time and one heck of a soccer player. She now plays for a team in Bergen. They just won their Division Championship and will be relegated up to the Premeire League next year. If you can't tell I'm very excited for her. At 16 I had to push her around and play like I did on my high school team to keep up. She is very good and very tough. We walked around Bergen and had a great meal. Afterwards she picked up some Norwegian snacks called Smash and we watched a movie at her place. Smash was really good and I ate way more than I should have. She showed me her skills on Guitar Hero and then we watched last season's season finale of the Simpsons. The episode was about Norwegians that come to Springfield and take the jobs no one in Springfield want. Springfield ends up building a wall, but no one in Springfield wants to build it so they pay the Norwegians to build it. There are some funny jokes about Norwegians and Americans and paints a satirical picture of the border fence between Mexico and the US. Grieg is also played in the background in the episode. Good stuff. She was a great host and I had a brilliant time.

I went to sleep soon after getting back to the hostel. I woke up at 5 AM to the man who complained about people being inconsiderate in a hostel snoring like a walrus in heat...I have no idea what that sounds like, but he was incredibly loud. I was going to take the 10:35 train from Bergen to Oslo in order to make my flight to London later that night, but the snoring was so terrible I couldn't get to sleep. I got up, showered, packed and moved my ticket up to the 7:45 AM train. I really am exhausted at this point with everything that has happened. I have an actual hotel room tonight at a Marriot and can't wait to sleep in without other people waking me up. Hopefully this helps me fight the cold.

The view on this train ride is unbelievable. The landscape looks like a fairy tale. Looking out on the vast fjords it seems perfectly reasonable for there to be trolls hidden in the snow peaked cliffs.

The family is a bit concerned about the warnings issued by the State Department and asked that I not spend the entire week in London. I finally agreed and will make like a Narnian child during World War II and escape to the birthplace of the Narnia books, Oxford, for two nights. 7 nights to go. A scary and exciting thing to think about. I can't wait to see family and friends, but don't want the adventure to end. Also, any job offers are more than welcome!

Copenhagen and Sweden (Stockholm and Gothenburg)

I woke up at 3:45 AM to make my 7 AM flight from Budapest to Copenhagen. I hated to spend the money on the flight, but I had no other choice. I flew the Hungarian Airlines in the One World Alliance. I believe it was called Malav or something. Of course, unlike airlines in the US they served a meal and gave out about 3 drinks a person on a 2 hour flight.

I flew into an overcast and cold Copenhagen. I don't think I will wear shorts or short sleeves for the rest of the trip. Highs over here are around 50-55 with lows going just under 40 degrees. My body keeps thinking it is Christmas time.

I checked dropped my luggage off at the hostel (can't check in until after 2 pm) and walked 2 kilometers to Tivoli Gardens. I attended a Childrens International Summer Villages camp in Denmark when I was 11 years old. I fell in love with Copenhagen. It is interesting how some memories from childhood are brighter than others. The day I was at Tivoli Gardens at 11 is one of my most vivid. I was one of the first in the park at 11:30 AM. I've been going non-stop for a number of days so I decided not to allow myself to see any tourist sight for the entire day and just enjoy Tivoli and relax. Due to how cold it gets in the winter, I was there for the last day of the season. All of the rides had zero line when I got there so I took full advantage. Yes, I know I am probably too old for this sort of thing, but they had some great rides and it was a walk down memory lane. It was good to see they opened some new rides since I was 11. There is an airplane ride that looks like a kids ride, but goes so fast you experience 5.2 G's. I think I rode the ride about 10 times that day. I was told by Danish in line 5 times that I wouldn't be able to handle the ride and would throw up. When they realized I was on a first name basis with the ride operator I was considered a "cool guy." During the ride you feel your face start to peel backwards as all of the liquid in your eyes escape out the side of your face. Awesome stuff:
I think I skipped ahead and should go back a bit to tell you about Tivoli Gardens. Tivoli Gardens is basically the original Disney World. I mean Disney based a lot of his theme park on Tivoli. It was found in the mid 1800's. The park is located in the middle of Copenhagen. The park is fairly small due to restrictions on space, but the landscaping and lighting is better than any amusement park I've ever been to. You get the feeling you are taken back to a different time and place. Tivoli has effectively maintained the charm of the original park while incorporating modern technology to appeal to everyone. They have everything from fancy restaurants to cheap snack bars.

Twice a day the Boys Tivoli marching band parades around the grounds. About 50 boys younger than 12 are dressed in English victorian soldier uniforms. In the middle of the procession is a small stagecoach guided by 2 miniature ponies. A boy and girl of around 8 wave to unlookers from inside. They are dressed like a prince and princess. It is very old school, but everyone in the park goes crazy whenever they go by.

By 9 PM I was completely exhausted and headed back to the hostel to get some rest. I stayed in an 8 bed mixed dorm room and when I got in another person was already asleep. As soon as my head hit the pillow I was out. I was rudely awoken an hour later by two dumb girls. They turned on the lights and talked for two hours without the slightest care for the two people sleeping in the room. I'm having a great time, but I really need a solid nights sleep. It has been a long, long time. The next day I got up and reserved a ticket to Stockholm before taking a canal tour of Copenhagen. The tour was great. One of the highlights was seeing the guy credited with founding Microsoft Excel's yacht in a prime location on the canal. The yacht looked like a navy vessel.

The famous little mermaid statue is currently on loan to China for the Expo so I didn't get to see her. The artist made another Little Mermaid Statue and Tivoli had it on loan on the pond.

We did get to see Hans Christian Anderson's House on the tour:

(The one with the balcony)

After the tour I walked around the shopping district and took in the sights.

The next day I took a train to Stockholm. I must say Swedish trains win the award for being the nicest with the most amenities. They have coffee, tea, and water available for free anytime during the journey, fruits and muffins, and free internet. If only every train was like that!

I got to Stockholm in the afternoon and walked around a bit to get my bearing. I met one of my dormmates by accidentally walking into the womens shower...always an adventure. I was without a doubt more scared than her. I hurried back to the room and hoped I'd never see the girl again, but of course as fate would have it she was one of my roommates. She walked in and was like, oh there is the pervert who walked in on my changing. I apologized profusely and she laughed it off. It all worked out because the next day I was changing in the room (Very exciting to see how fast you can change in a mixed dorm room) and she walked in and saw the fall boxer brief line of Brent's wardrobe.

The next morning I got up and had breakfast at the cafe connected to the hostel before booking a ticket to Gothenburg and going on a hop on hop off tour bus. The tour was great. I went to the Vassar museum. The Vassar is a huge ship commissioned by the King of Sweden hundreds of years ago. It only sailed 150 meters before sinking in the harbor. It would be the equivalent of the worlds largest cruise ship leaving the dock on its first voyage and immediately going down. Around 50 people died when it sank and I can only imagine how many others were put to death for their mistakes.

The ship was somehow brought to the surfect about 50 years ago and now resides in the museum. It is incredible how put together it is after sitting on the ocean floor for so long. Check it out:

(What it looked like when it set sail)

Here is the Governator. For some reason the curator who put together an amazing museum couldn't help him or herself and had to relate a brilliant wooden statue from the ship of Hercules to Arnold's less memorable role. Well, I mean the one where he is in New York City as Hercules is a cinematic masterpiece.

(Also, why is the Governator picture at that level)

After the Vassar Museum I went to one of the largest open air museums in the world. The place was basically like an Amish amusement park. Each building had a different profession from a town showing how things were done 150 years ago. I saw glass blowing, animals, beautiful gardens, and a great view of the city.
Check out this kid. Poor kid was just trying to walk like an Egyptian while this bird got all up in his business:

After the outdoor museum I finished out the tour before grabbing some dinner. Sweden has a lot of Mexican food restaurants and I've been craving spicy food, especially Tex Mex for 2 months now. The place was okay, much better than any other tex-mex/mexican food place I've tried in Europe. They also had Dos XX. I ordered one and the lady was amazed. She asked if I ever had it before. I told her it is one of my favorites. Evidently, they are the only restaurant to carry it. I won't say how much one bottle of Dos XX cost, but it was nice to have Texas type food for a change.

After dinner I met up with a group from the hostel going to Karaoke. We thought it would be like American karaoke, mostly for laughs with a few exceptional singers along the way. We were wrong. Swedes are professional karaoke singers. Here is a short video I was able to take. They were incredible. People from our group got up to sing and made fools of ourselves, but the Swedish were polite about us ruining their ears for years to come. The group tried to get me to sing, but as many of you know, singing is not one of my gifts. It is without a doubt a curse. I spared the country of Sweden. After the karaoke place we went to a club one of the guys knew about. It was called "Soap." At this point I was pretty good friends with a group of guys from Georgia. I went to the restroom and had my backside squeezed by 3 different guys on the way. This struck me as odd. I didn't say anything to the other guys because, well it was awkward. Another one of the guys came back to the group and in a Chris Farley-esque rant yelled about all the hands that were squeezing his backside on the way to the bathroom. Between the two of us we pinpointed what we called "The Bermuda Butt Grabbing Triangle" of three very drunk guys. Another of the Georgia guys was like I want to test this out. He walked through and there was no grabbage. He was really dissapointed and hurt. Needless to say when we walked out I was accosted by the Bermuda Triangle again. Another story from the place: A tall girl was dancing behind us and then all of a sudden takes the girl next to her and dips her and they proceed to play intense tonsil hockey. Nothing wrong with this, I've been to sorority parties and thought nothing of it (well okay, I thought a little bit of it). Then when the tall girl released the other girl we saw a massive adams apple and figured out the tall girl was a guy. We learned so much.

Outside the club, one of the Georgia guys asked the bouncer if "Soap" is a gay club. He smirked and said no. When asked what percentage of the clientel is gay he said around 75%. The Georgia guy then explained to the bouncer and unfair it was because there were a lot of hot girls, but they were best friends with the gay guys and there is no way he could dance near as well as the gay guys and therefore he was at a severe disadvantage. He was saying it mostly in a joking tone, it was really funny. The bouncer told him to work on his dancing. Nothing at all wrong with gay clubs. It was just funny that it took us 4 hours to figure out what was happening. Beware of Bermuda Triangles.

After the club we walked back to the hostel, but one of the guys was hungry so we begrudgingly went into Mcdonalds. We were amazed at how a regular cheeseburger cost around $3 US dollars. A Swedish guy at the table next to us got mad at us about this. He almost got in a fight with one of the Georgia guys, but I talked him down. I told him how furious I am about Ikea prices being lower in Sweden. We had a good world politics and economics conversation and by the end we were good friends and he apologized for being so agitated. I've found in many places the stereotype of Americans are arrogant jerks. Some Europeans automatically judge me based on this. It's sad that is the case. That and the George W. Bush talk are basically daily conversations for me. I hope there are better conversations in the future.

The next morning I got up and took the train to Gothenburg. Gothenburg is I believe the second biggest city in Sweden. I got into the hostel and pretty much chilled for the rest of the evening. I met guys from Switzerland and Britain. Had an interesting conversation with the Swiss guy about war. He was very proud his country had been at peace for hundreds of years. He is right to be proud, but at the same time, when is it right to stand up for injustice?

I got up early the next morning and toured all over Gothenburg. I've driven a Volvo since I was 18 so I hit up the Volvo Museum. Gothenburg is the birthplace of Volvo. It was really dorky, but enjoyable. Here is a desk the Presidents sat across from eachother at from the beginning of the company. I don't believe you hear about that happening anymore.

After the Volvo Museum I went on a ferris wheel where I got a birds-eye view of the city.
I walked around the shopping district without buying a thing. Then I went to the Universeum. It was a natural history/science museum. Very cool place.

There was a rainforest and incredible aquarium.

There was a terrible display where you stood in a small capsule and they showed you what it feels like on the north pole by blowing freezing air at you.

Here is the most poisonous frog in the world.

I miss Shark Week.

Quick Video:

After the Universeum, I met up with the Swiss guy and two British guys and we went out to get drinks. We met some very nice people and verified that Swedish women are very, very attractive.

The next day I went to Liseberg Amusement Park. It is the number one amusement park in Scandinavia. The place was awesome. They have the best wooden rollercoaster in the world(It really was incredible).
When it is 40-45 degrees the scariest rides are the water rides which were still open?! I took this as a challenge and took on the Roaring Rapids and Log Flume. I was drenched. The weather didn't slow the Swedes down at all. They loved the water rides. Out of control.

Whew! I'm finally caught up. I slept in a bit this morning went to the train station. I'm on the train to Oslo, Norway. I am pretty exhausted, but I'm not very good at just chilling out and relaxing. I need to work on that before reality hits in 12 days. Hope everyone is well at home!